Hey look! There’s Nepal, that’s where half of Wyview’s from!

You know, I’ve been living with a Nepali dude for a little over a month now, and let me tell you something. If everyone in Nepal is similar to my roommate, Krishna…I really feel sorry for those poor saps who climb Mount Everest/K2.

Let me just start off by saying that Krishna is a pretty cool guy. He’s embraced the Gospel and seems to be learning the things he needs to know in order to be acclimated to US/Mormon culture. I guess I would just call him a “work in progress.”

Let me just give you a brief overview of the things that I’ve now assumed about the entirety of the Nepalese culture: 1) They are totally nocturnal and are awake only between the hours of midnight and about 2-3pm, but are always asleep by 4pm. 2) Onions are the national food, and are eaten in every way imaginable, including apple style. 3) The entire country of Nepal is a giant cesspool full of infectious diseases, because cleaning is absolutely not tolerated. 4) In each town there is a community music guy who plays his music at 135 dB, so that everyone in the town can hear it. 5) Phone time has to be rationed, because it is constantly in use. 6) When people wake up in the evening (see #1 above) it is perfectly acceptable to break out randomly into song, whether or not you know the lyrics, or have any idea what the key may or may not be. 7) Door locks either don’t exist, or are totally obsolete, because they are never used. 8- Every light in every house is on…and every window is open…all the time. Though this might help to explain the door locks…hmm 9) There is no such thing as a bed…everyone sleeps on couches.

So, today I missed Saturday Afternoon Baseball because my roommate Krishna decided that he had to unplug my TV and fall asleep with his head on top the outlet…so it was kind of a long day.

Yay for cell phones!!!

So, a couple of weeks ago, my dad called my up and told me that my mom wasn’t going to be working for a little while, so the cell phone service was going to go bye-bye.  Well, at that point, I thought, “Alright, I’m pretty sure that I can live without my cell phone.  I only use it to call my parents once a week and talk to Feech for some insane amount of time most nights…so I’ll be good.” Then the thought occurred to me, “Hey, after the service expires, I can take the actual phone back to Denver and blow in to pieces with a shotgun!”  Let me just say that that was a happy thought…:)

But then, between Geology lab, and my Geology test (yeah, it was that kind of day), my dad called me and told me that we were no longer going to have a land-line in our home, but that we would just have cell phones.  He also said that my mom and I will still have the same numbers as before and that his would change to what our home number is now.

I think the best part of it is that I get a new phone.  I mean my current phone and I have had some good memories.  There was that one time when I chucked it across the room in anger, it flipped open and went under the couch…and it still worked just fine.  There was that time at FHE, when we were playing cops and robbers and I fell into a canal and was soaked from the belt, down…and it still worked just fine…ahh the memories.  But, I think it’s prime has passed.  I mean it was the phone that came free when we signed up for the service…an LG anonymo-phone.  Yet, it will go down in glory from the barrel of my shotgun…and it will never be forgotten!

Anywho, my new phone will be a Sanyo Katana LX…I think; don’t quote me on the LX part.  I doesn’t have much in the way of features, but I really don’t use much in the way of features.  I generally call/receive calls, text/receive texts…occasionally, take a few pictures…and that’s pretty much it.  It will also be nice to have a phone that doesn’t leave an imprint on my pants due to its obscene forward displacement.  It’s kind of like a skoal ring…except it’s more like a fat cell phone rectangle.

And now I’ve blogged way too much about cell phones…but hey, what did you expect from an entry entitled, “Yay for cell phones!!!”

Yay for EFY!

So, today I was walking through the Riv on my way to class from Wyview and I see a brigade of teenage girls, dressed in Sunday attire, all moving in the same general direction as I was.  When I made it to Helaman Halls, I saw quite the congregation of teenagers of all shapes, sizes, genders, but not colors, ’cause I’m in Utah.

And, of course all of these efy-goers are clearly marked by the name-tag and/or lanyard and/or fluorescent colored wristband that all of them seem to have.  I’ve decided that I’m going to call the name-tag/lanyard, the “Jailbait Tag,” while the wristband doesn’t even need a name, since you can see it from space.  It can just be infamously know as the “Wristband.”  The jailbait tag has earned it’s name by the fact that it would appear that only the young ladies are willing to put it around their neck and wear it as an actual name-tag.  However, I don’t blame the dudes…I wouldn’t where the stupid name-tag either.

So, then, on my way back home I was accompanied down the ramp between the Tanner Building and Helaman Halls (I think I’m going to call that one the “Bike Nazi Ramp”), I was accompanied by two boys who I would estimate would be in the 12-year-old range.  I know that this is impossible, seeing as a youth has to be at least 14 to attend EFY, but I don’t care.  For all intents and purposes, they’re 12.  When I made my way into Helaman Halls, I was again in the midst of a multitudinous throng of 14-18-year-olds.  At that point, I realized that I was the only one there who was a) in street clothes, and 2) able to be there without a permission slip.  The only evidence that I had that EFY kids hadn’t totally infested Helaman Halls was that I forgot my surveying field book at my apartment and had to go get it between lecture and lab.

Now that I think about infestations, I think that the EFY kids could stage a coup during the night, set up barricades and seize total control of the campus…  And on that note, I take my leave…

The Satan Pit

So, I was thinking today that some poor, misguided souls at the “U” might think that the Utes’ showing in the Deseret First Duel actually amounted to more than a hill of crap. Let me debunk that rumor/thought right off. First of all, THEY LOST!!! They had many chances to win the competition, even after BYU won the football game, and you know what…they either really sucked, or really choked. And just to emphasize the effect, let me review the sports that BYU and Utah won within the Duel. (each in order of points contributed to the school’s total)

BYU: Football, Men’s Basketball, Volleyball, Baseball, Softball, Swimming

Utah: Women’s Basketball, Soccer, Gymanstics, Baseball, Softball, Tennis

Total points won in men’s sports: BYU-24, Utah-4

Total points won in women’s sports: BYU-10, Utah-26

Now, let’s note that the only outright men’s championship won by the “U” was in tennis…for a grand total of one point contributed to the overall score; whoopdy-freakin’-doo! Even then, they only tied in one other men’s sport, baseball; for a whopping three points. BYU, on the other hand won or tied in every men’s event that was attended by…anyone, really.

Now, I don’t want to offend any female athletes, but seriously, no one cares! I went to the BYU-U of U women’s basketball game, and the student section was a only a quarter full…seriously! The only women’s sport that people in Utah care about is Volleyball, and BYU friggin’ dominated in Volleyball last year.

But I will give the “U” one thing: their women are definitely more manly than ours…but I guess we already knew that.

I haz been heeled by the powah of JEEEEZUUUUSSSS!!!!!!!!!

So, last night, I definitely had an interesting experience.  My favorite Nepali roommate aka Krishna forwarded me an email entitled “Why boys shouldn’t cheat on girls!”  When I opened it had been forwarded about eleventy billion times, so I figured that it must be really good.  Well I was wrong.  Apparently it was about some girl named “Ashley” who was supposedly the second most popular girl at her high school.  She was going out with the most popular dude at her school named “Jack.”  Well, one day, she overhears Jack and “Courtney” (the most popular girl at her school) talking about how they’re going to go to a movie later on.  Well Ashley follows them around to the movie and follows them home where she watches through the window as they do the nasty.  Then, apparently, no one sees Ashley for a couple of days until her parents find her dead in her closet with a suicide note right next to her.  The email goes on to say that if I don’t forward this email, Ashley will come visit me tonight and kill me in my sleep…and I’ll lose the one that I love.

Let me just go on to point out the inconsistencies in this email before I detail the rest of my experience:  1) It tells me that I will both be killed and lose my love interest…no crap, I’ll definitely lose my love interest if I’m dead!  2) The author of this email new exactly what was in the suicide note that was found beside “Ashley.”  I would seriously doubt that that would happen.  3) The author of this email new exactly what “Ashley” was thinking throughout this whole process; if Ashley had truly killed herself, she probably wouldn’t have shared such intimate feelings with anyone immediately beforehand.  4)  The author new the exact circumstances concerning “Jack” and “Courtney” preceding Ashley’s death.  5) This sounds suspiciously like a chain letter sent out by some skanky h*b*tch who was shafted by some dude and was bitter about it.

Now, on to the rest of my experience.  So, after reading this email, and even after discovering all the inconsistencies, I was still a little freaked out.  But then I thought to myself, “Hey, if some disembodied spirit wants to give me crap, I’ll just cast it out by the power of the Priesthood.”  That made me feel quite a bit better.  Then I read in the March issue of the Ensign about Jesus and His marvelous ability to heal people and feed them by His Atonement.  That made me feel really good.  Then, just for added measure, I prayed and asked my Father in Heaven to protect me from the power of Satan and any who were under his grasp.  I then crawled into bed, ready to lift my right arm to the square at any moment…and promptly fell asleep; sleeping like a baby until this morning.

I think the lesson that I’m going to take away from this story is that of fear vs. faith.  My testimony was reaffirmed that Satan works by inspiring men with fear and enmity, while our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ work by faith in their names to build up the children of men against the power of Satan.

Now ain’t that just awesome?

‘Twas the best of times…’twas the worst of times

So, today, I went into for surveying class at 8am, just like every other Tuesday and Thursday at 8am, except today I was expecting to get my one and only midterm in that class back.  Well, Dr. Reese said that he had the test all graded and ready to hand back, but with only one glitch.  He had to give them back to the college so that they could “insure” that we are meeting the “competency standards” set for by some Hitler-esque accreditations board.  And he doesn’t know when he’ll be getting them back.  And you got to say to yourself, “Well, that’s stupid,” ’cause it is.  But, on the bright side, I didn’t have any surveying lab today, because they’re on Monday and Tuesday, and Monday was Memorial Day, so there weren’t any on Tuesday either.

Well, then, after I exited my surveying class, I decided that I’d go home and check the balance in my checking account, since it’s a weekday between 10am and 3pm, they’d probably be open.  Well, they were, and after being on hold for about 10 minutes, they told me that the balance in my checking account was $17.99.  And I said, “Alright, sounds good,” while I was thinking, “Oh, freakin’ mother-o-crap, I am flat-butt freakin’ broke!”  So then, I called up my dad, and told him of my situation, that I had enough cash to survive, and pay my bills, but putting cash in an envelope and sending it to the cockroach SOBs at credit card companies wasn’t a good idea.  Then he told me, “Well boy, you could just get a money order.”  And the light clicked on and I said to myself, “Oh, brilliant!  I have been saved!”  So, yeah, at least that crisis has been mostly averted.

Now, on to the trouble of Differential Equations/Geology midterms…

So, when I look at the AL East standings, I think that the baseball gods must be displeased

So, if someone had told me eight months ago that the Tampa Bay Rays would be in first place in the AL East, and the New York Yankees would be in last I would have laughed so hard that I would have peed a little.  But that is indeed the situation that Major League Baseball fans find themselves in.  Everything has been turned upside down from a year ago.  Last October, three teams in the NL West were contending for playoff spots.  Now two of those teams are well below .500 and other seems to be in a perpetual death spiral.  Last year, I said myself that no team from the NL Central deserved to be in the playoffs.  This year, the Cubs seem to be the powerhouse of the NL, with the Cardinals not far behind.

Now, I’m not usually one for conspiracy theories, but I really do think that much of the dissonance between this season and last is due to the “crackdown” on steroids use in Major League Baseball.  An MLB fan could be found to say that last year’s greats were only so because of steroids, and with the recent tightening of enforcement on steroids policies, these teams are in shambles.

As long as we’re talking about steroids conspiracy theories, let me tell you about another one of mine.  Through less than two months of play, this season, there have been an irrational number of injuries across the board.  Now, anyone who has watched a sporting event in the last ten years can probably tell you that steroids can help to prevent on-field injuries and that they can help athletes to heal more quickly after an injury.  It would seem natural that, upon a virtual re-ban of steroids, that a rash of injuries would break out.  Now, you might be asking at this point, “So are you proposing that Major League Baseball lift the ban on steroid use?”  My answer would be, “No, heck no.  H-E-quintuple hockey sticks, no!”  I would personally say that the Major League Baseball season needs to be shortened.  A 162-game season isn’t just approaching ridiculous anymore, it’s downright insane.  The only reason that it was possible before was because of steroids use.  Now, athletes are going to get hurt and the quality of games is going to plummet (not that it hasn’t already) when September rolls around.

But, I guess it’s all in the hands of Bud Selig…

Oh, the humanity of it all…

So, this evening, I was looking at some stuff for Math 334, aka Ordinary Differential Equations, aka Hell.  And I must admit that I felt a little sick.  I mean literally, I felt nauseous after about five minutes of exploring the basic premises of ordinary differential equations.  You know, I really don’t want to pull off a repeat of Math 343, aka “Elementary” Linear Algebra, aka “Ah! Kill me now and make the pain stop,” aka “Screw you Humpherys!”  I ended up not learning a dang thing in that class yet managed to escape with a C.  Apparently everyone else was just as clueless as I was.  Well, apparently,  ordinary differential equations involves many of the same concepts and principles as linear algebra, though it does seem to be more concrete.

I find that the solution to this problem (hopefully) will come in the form of a book.  In Google search, I typed in “differential equations for dummies,” not really expecting much to come of it.  I mean, seriously, “differential equations for dummies” is most definitely an oxymoron; if you’ve even made it to diffEQ, you are quite the antithesis of a dummy.  But then, lo and behold, Wiley has “Differential Equations for Dummies” coming out on June 3rd of this year.  If you failed to recognize the date on this post, that’s in literally eight days.  That one’s definitely going to make it into my prayers, tonight…and I will consider that blessing counted.  So I promptly went to Amazon.com and pre-ordered the book for about $18.  It’s definitely worth the money.

Though that made me think of another hitch in this whole “life plan” that I’ve been working on.  The last time I checked the balance on my checking account, it was around $420.  And that would be just grand if I could remember when I checked that balance.  Because, upon looking through my duplicate checks, I’ve found that I paid about $300 at the end of April, for my last credit card payments.  And I know that you’re saying, “Repent ye, repent ye, and quit spending money like it’s going out of style!”  The problem is that I already have.  Over the last month I’ve paid for everything in cash, and have pinched every penny until Abe Lincoln screamed for mercy.  Yet, I don’t know if I have enough digital money to pay for the crap that I’ve already charged.  I definitely have enough cash to pay for everything (thanks mom ), but you know, sending the cockroach SOBs at credit card companies cash in an envelope just isn’t a good idea.

I’m pretty sure that this shouldn’t be that big of a problem.  I can just not pay off the balances in their entirety and wait until I can deposit some cash into my checking account.  In fact, that’s probably the plan at this point, if I don’t actually have enough digital money.  But, you know, it’s still kind of disconcerting.

Though, on the bright side, all this makes my Geology midterm/ lab quiz this week not seem so bad…:)

I’m a Ramblin’ Wreck from Georgia Tech and a Heckuvan Engineer

So, recently, I’ve been thinking about where I want to go to grad school and exactly what I want to study. I’m positive that I’m going to go into civil engineering, that I’m going to go into industry for at least a couple of years before I return to grad school, and that I’m going to go into either structural or transportation.

At this point, I’m thinking that I want to go to either the Georgia Institute of Technology or Texas A&M University. This is of greater concern now, since I would want to move to either Georgia or Texas in order to establish state residency to get in-state tuition. I’ve found that both Georgia Tech and Texas A&M have exceptional transportation and structural engineering programs and that I could probably get into either without any problem, so that’s not that big of a deal.

The thing that’s been straining (ironically) my thoughts is which specialization I should go into, whether structural or transportation engineering. At this point, I have much more experience with structural engineering, having taken both statics and mechanics of materials. I really enjoyed those classes, and think that I could do well being a structural engineer. Though, I also look at course descriptions and other information for transportation engineering and it sounds like something that I would find super-interesting and would really enjoy doing as a career. I was thinking that I could go into transportation materials, though I think that I only find that interesting for the structural portion, so I might as well go into structures at that point.

I think that I’m just going to have take some more classes in structural and…some classes in transportation. I’m probably going to take Intro to Transportation from Dr. Saito. People say that he’s not the best professor that they’ve ever had…(sarcastically said, of course.) So, if I still fell the need to go into transportation after taking that class, I’m thinking that I will.

So, Apparently I’m Blogging Now…

So, after extensive pressure from all sides…mostly from my gf (Thanks Feech) I’ve decided to start this weblog…Oh joy, oh rapture!  If you’re reading this you either know me, or are stalking me.  If you’re stalking me, I would recommend looking more at my Facebook profile.  It contains much more pertinent information about me that you can use for all of your stalking needs.  I’ll probably be adding a real post momentarily, so let the stalking begin!!!